A Molten Moment

Nobody is going to make this easy for us once on the other side of this life-altering time when things will supposedly return to normal. Except they won’t, or at least they don’t have to. Not if normal means how things were before, not the possibility of what they can be in the future

Living under conditions that separate us from one another, we remember that we are all connected, and that our individual survival is hardwired with that of the collective.

As the price of oil plummets, we can almost hear the sound of Earth catching her breath. The absence of noise reminds us to listen the deep quiet beneath it all.

Living as we are, under our own microscopes, everything about us is magnified. On any given day, the best of us might make her presence know, or be completely overshadowed by the worst, Most days it is a dance between the two, and the invitation at our feet is to learn to let the better angels of our nature take the lead.

We are discovering just how little we really need, and how much we don’t.

We are remembering what it means to be neighbors again. As we care for one another the world becomes a safer place, and while tribalism might have kept us alive in the past, it will do nothing but insure our demise in the future.

The powers that be are going to work mightily to persuade us to forget the hard-earned wisdom that we belong to one another and are indeed one another’s keepers including the care for this fragile planet we all call home.

This is a molten moment.

We have the chance to be changed for the greater good, and our calling is to remember what we are learning in the here and now once we step back out into our shared world of the there and then.

No matter what anyone tells us, and I mean anyone, things will not return to normal. At least that is my deepest hope and my most fervent prayer.

Photo: USGS

Come To The #wakeupappreciaterepeat Party.

This is a repeat of an earlier post. Given the ongoing COVID-19 crisis, I’m sharing it again in the hope of transforming this post into a shared practice.

If you want to join the #wakeupappreciaterepeat party, you are invited to post your three appreciations for the day on Instagram along with the hashtag, and invite any and everyone to join in.

Gratitude and appreciation matter more than ever.

Let’s get this party started!

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How we start any given day sets in motion our eventual arrival at the end.

I’ve done this particular practice on a hit or miss basis in the past. Not any longer. All hit, no miss.

It’s a simple practice and one that didn’t originate with me.

The very first thing, or no later than my first cup of coffee, I identify three things that I appreciate. To be honest, some days it is harder than others to come up with one, much less three. Thankfully, Sleepy Monk Coffee is an automatic go-to, because no matter how bleak or bright the day, I am always grateful for that first sip, which means I’m already a third of the way to my goal. One down, two to go.

To stay on track, I text my three things to the daughter who shared this practice with me in the first place, and she texts her three back, along with the practice hashtag.

Sleepy Monk Coffee

My husband Tom

Connection - Virtual or otherwise

#wakeupappreciaterepeat

Not a bad way to start the day.

(With gratitude to Lo for sharing this life-giving practice.)

Sabbath

When we consecrate a time to listen to the still, small voices, we remember the root of inner wisdom that makes work fruitful. We remember from where we are most deeply nourished, and see more clearly the shape and texture of the people and things before us.” 

~ Wayne Muller, Sabbath: Finding Rest, Renewal, and Delight in our Busy Lives

For the last 575 days I have written something to share here with my readers. Most of those days the daily practice of writing has been life giving, and, on the ones when it wasn’t, it still fed me in meaningful and fruitful ways.

Today, I find myself in need of rest. A kind of sabbath of sorts from the sifting and sorting through the questions that intrigue me, the ideas that captivate me, and putting those thoughts into words that I hope will resonate with others. I will never stop sifting and sorting and working to put those thoughts into the world. That, it seems, is part of what I am here to do.

For now, however, I will share my thoughts here as I feel inspired, but I am also consecrating a time to listen, and to find nourishment that will bear fruit in my life, the world around me, and on the page.

Thank you for every step you’ve walked with me till now. I can’t wait to meet again further down the trail.

Photo: Tom Pierson

The Roundabout

Roundabouts, also known as traffic circles, allow traffic to flow in one direction around a central island. There are usually several exits that let drivers continue on down the road. More than once I’ve found myself going around a traffic circle several times, somehow having missed my exit. Eventually I would get out of the circle and continue on my way.

Sometimes processing an emotional issue feels a lot like getting caught in a roundabout. We need to keep motoring around the matter in question until finally, we are ready to exit the circle, and continue on our way.

Photo by Tuur Tisseghem from Pexels

Cancelled

There are a lot of things being cancelled right now due to the uncertainty and panic surrounding the Coronavirus. Airline flights, conferences, meetings, conventions, sports team practices, long planned vacations and birthday parties, just to name a few, are getting axed. Eventually, especially if well-informed and calmer heads prevail, we will find our way out of this mess, but until we do, cancellation will continue to be a major buzz word.

Recently, for reasons far less significant and serious than a possible pandemic, a few events and obligations on my calendar have been scrubbed. My response every time was an immediate “Yes!” followed by a sigh of relief. Now, the things being cancelled were things I was committed to and even looking forward to.

However.

The fact that my first reaction was relief and not disappointment told me something. My response suggested that perhaps I needed a little more open space on my calendar and more generous margins around my days. I’ve taken these cancellations as a reminder to take a beat before adding something to my calendar.

The next time something on your calendar is cancelled, notice your response, and then, respond accordingly.

Photo by Jonas Kakaroto from Pexels

Front-Loading

I’m not a professional project manager by any standard, unless planning and pulling off a few exceptional weddings and an epic 70th birthday party count. But one thing I know for sure is that any project goes better when it is front-loaded.

The concept is often associated with large-scale industrial projects. During the front-end phase important milestones are set, and changes can be incorporated early on, which while requiring an investment in time, money, and effort in the beginning, pale in comparison to the cost to make changes and fix mistakes later on.

What is true of large-scale industrial projects is true of small personal ones as well. Anything from planting a garden, preparing for a new baby, organizing a garage, finding a new job, starting a side-gig, training for a challenging backpacking trip, to planning a bucket-list vacation will benefit from front-loading. Not only does putting in the time early on to plan for what you hope for in the end help bring your vision to life, what it saves in emotional energy is almost impossible to quantify.

The free-floating anxiety that can overwhelm us when we haven’t taken the time to get it out of our heads and down “on paper” can drown our enthusiasm for even the most exciting project faster than you can say “Gantt Chart”. Front-loading will keep us afloat.

Photo: Startup Stock Photo on Pexels.com

Not The Whole Book

Whenever we are in the midst of something where we can’t see over the horizon of our current hurdle, heartache, or hardship, we can feel trapped. It can be hard to fathom that eventually we will make it over, through, or to the other side of whatever it is. It will always be like this whispers the voice that shows up in the middle of the night.

No.

It won’t.

We forget that our life is a book, and that whatever is going on, it isn't the whole book.

It is a chapter in that book, or a page in that chapter, or a sentence on that page, or a word in that sentence, or even a letter in that word.

Whatever it is, it’s not the whole book.

And.

Whatever it is, let’s make it a meaningful part of our story.

Photo: Pixabay on Pexels.com

Heart Broken

One of the most painful acts of love is to bear witness to the pain of another, love them with all of your might, and not be able to fix, solve, or make better. The most we can do is be present with them in the midst of it all, trusting that that can make all the difference.

It breaks your heart to love that way.

It breaks it wide open, making room for more.

Photo: Paul Blenkhorn on Pexels.com

Make A Mess

Embrace the glorious mess that you are.

~ Elizabeth Gilbert

“Don’t make a mess.”

How often did I hear that as a child growing up? How often did I say that to my own kids? From an early age most of us are programed to believe that making a mess is wrong. That if we mess up we will disappoint others.

Making a mess is essence of creativity.

Making a mess is at the heart of every worthwhile endeavor.

Making a mess is how we sort things out.

Making a mess is how we make a life.

Relationships are messy.

We are messy.

Life is messy.

So go ahead, make a mess.

Photo: Beanpole Pottery

A Better Drift

None of us sees the world in exactly the same way, and the needs that we each have are as different as we are from one another. Understanding this, and knowing what to do about it, is the good, and hard work of human relationships. Especially with those we care about the most.

It seems to be in our nature to give love and respect to others in the ways in which we want to receive them ourselves. To express our needs and wants in the language and timing that works for us. And here’s the clincher—we expect others to know what we want and need from them without having to tell them. None of these are good ideas. I know this because I’ve tried them for years with the same results. Hurt feelings, disappointment, resentment, loneliness, frustration, anger…I could keep going but you probably catch my drift. Maybe you share some version of the same drift too.

If we don’t want the same old same old., we have to try something new.

Rather than expecting others to know what we need and how to love us well, let’s tell them Specifically.

Rather than guessing what others need and how to love them well, let’s ask them. Specifically.

With practice we just might find ourselves catching a new and better drift.