Word Of The Day: TRUSTING

Over the next few weeks I will be focusing on a word of the day drawn from a list created at the beginning of January. Each word was chosen to serve as a guide to inspire and inform my steps through 2020. If you are just joining me now and want to look in on earlier posts on this topic, you will find links to each at the end.

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TRUSTING

An adjective that describes one who has a belief in the honesty and sincerity of others, and in the underlying goodness of the world. Trusting is how we arrive on the planet, confident that we will be seen, loved and cared for. But somewhere along the way, through our encounters with disappointment, heartache, loss, and sometimes overt trauma, our trust can give way to wariness and fear, suspicion and cynicism. Not the way I want to live.

To be trusting is a commitment to both curiosity and caution. Curiosity leads to the discovery of new insights and information, helping us make more enlightened and knowledgable choices. Caution implies a willingness to be attentive and alert to the reality around us, leading to better decisions and more meaningful actions.

To be trusting is to look beyond the immediacy of life and put it into the context of the bigger picture. It is to remember that we have internal and external resources upon which to call to meet what life brings our way.

To be trusting is not the same as being naive, which is blind faith without thought. Rather it is a commitment to live with eyes wide open, embrace what is true, and bring the best of what we have to the life that is ours, and trusting that it will be enough.

Photo: Pexels

Words To Hang Our 2020 Hats On

Word Of The Day: ALIVE

Word Of The Day: ALIVE 2.0

Word Of The Day: ENERGIZED

Word Of The Day: TRUSTING

Word Of The Day: ALIVE 2.0

ALIVE

While alive can mean simply not being dead, when it comes to crafting a meaningful life, that’s not saying much. Lungs can continue to fill and hearts can go on beating long after a soul has moved on to wherever souls move on. In the same way, we can continue existing on the planet without truly being alive.

To be alive is to be alert to the all that life brings our way. It isn’t always easy or comfortable, but then I don’t think it is meant to be. To be alive is to actively engage with the truth, no matter how painful, scary, or inconvenient. We can even feel at our most alive when we have survived a challenge we weren’t sure we could manage—like crossing the finish line of a marathon, after a last chemo treatment, holding our newborn after hours of labor, or finally confronting our hidden fears and wounds for the first time.

To be alive is to be aware. It is to be interested in the world around us, and to continue to expand and grow even as our bodies diminish. To be alive means to follow the breadcrumb trail of our curiosity over the next rise in the trail, and the next and the next and the next. To be alive is to never cease exploring, wondering, and searching.

To be alive is to be teeming with whatever it is that enlivens us to the point that we can’t contain it. It is to be filled to overflowing with the certainty that our lives matter, despite any evidence to the contrary. So certain that we can’t help but show up for our life and say yes to its invitation. Over, and over, and over, until it’s all over.

(If you are just joining me now on the trail that is 2020, and the list of words that will travel with me to inspire and inform my steps, you can check out earlier posts on this topic below.)

Word of the Day: ALIVE

Curiosity And The Cat

Fear slinks in like a cat. So quiet, she goes undetected, and before we know it she is rubbing up against our leg, and just like that, we are under her spell. If you are like me, fear is rooted in the past, and left unchecked, will sow the seeds of the future. Here’s the thing about fear. We are usually afraid of what might happen, or could happen, but the truth of the matter is, it hasn’t happened yet. Rather than believe our scary story and act as if it is true, maybe we can find our way to curiosity. Take a deep breath and simply take the next step, see where it takes us, and trust that since we’ve made it this far, we have no reason to doubt that we will find our way further down our road.

I am no stranger to fear, and have to continually learn that it almost never leads to the next wise choice or the next right step. It only digs my hole a little deeper. Curiosity, however, always seems to lead me to the next rung of the ladder. And the next, and the next, and the next.

Curiosity may not kill the scaredy cat, but it can tame her just a little bit.

Photo: Gijs Coolen on Pexels.com

The Arcs of Our Histories

“I do not pretend to understand the moral universe. The arc is a long one. My eye reaches but little ways. I cannot calculate the curve and complete the figure by experience of sight. I can divine it by conscience. And from what I see I am sure it bends toward justice.” 

Theodore Parker                                                                                                                                       (Unitarian Minister and abolitionist. This quote is an excerpt from a sermon he delivered in 1853.)

My husband Tom and I arrived last night at the home of our dear friend, Birthe, in Lindum, a village in Denmark that dates back 2500 years. The family home, which was built in the 1800s, sits across the street from the village blacksmith shop, and in the shadow of the village church that was constructed in 12th century.

Next to the house, and behind the church, is the village cemetery.

From her kitchen window, our friend is able to see the stone, found in her garden, that marks the grave of her husband, Niels, also Tom’s host brother when he was here in 1965 as a high school foreign exchange student. 

We slept upstairs in one of the many bedrooms in this house that has been home to the same family for five generations. 

Before a new day dawned, the small house next door burned down. 

As we sit over coffee this morning, smoke still hanging in the air from the fire, and the church bells ringing in a new day, as they have every morning for generations, I can’t help but be struck by both the shortness of a life span, and the long arc of the history of this place. 

The tension between the two is worthy of our consideration.

Towards what do the long arcs of our own short histories bend?

Written with gratitude to Birthe, and in memory of Niels.  

Heads AND Tails

 “Always remember, your focus determines your reality.” ~ George Lucas

Yesterday we headed out to Zugspitze, the highest mountain in Germany. From the top we would be able to see mountains in four countries: Germany, Austria, Switzerland, and Italy. The day got off to a rocky start, as Tom was laser focused on the details of getting us from here to there, while I was all about the experience between here and there. He wanted to make sure we got where we were going. I wanted to make sure we got the most out of getting there. 

That happens to us a lot. 

The best example of that yesterday happened smack dab in the middle of the Munich Hauptbanhof (train station). Purchasing our tickets was a lot like standing in line at the DMV. We arrived, took a number, and waited. While we waited, I studied the people. Tom studied the map.

That happens to us a lot. 

Finally, tickets in hand, with about 12 minutes to spare, we headed for track number 29. Tom dashed ahead, laser focused on getting us from here to there, I was a few steps behind, taking in what was going on between here and there. Just in time, I grabbed him by the shirttails. “Look at that!” I said, pointing straight in front of me.  “Look at what?” Tom said, staring blankly toward where my arm was pointing. “That! Right there!” I said. “What?! Where?!” he said. “That!” I said. “Oh!”, he said.

That happens to us a lot. “

One more step and he would have walked right into the middle of a marriage proposal. Literally. A determined looking young man, down on one knee, ring box in hand, looking hopefully at a delighted looking young woman, hand over her mouth, in tears. Sometimes love looks the same in any language.  

Tom would have missed it if I hadn’t stopped him. We would have missed our train if he hadn’t stopped to figure out where we were going.

That happens to us a lot  

We are two sides of the same coin. 

Heads? We make it from here to there.

Tails? We make the most out of getting there.

It takes both sides of the coin to cash in on life.