In his latest book (The Great Spiritual Migration: How The World’s Largest Religion Is Seeking A Better Way To Be Christian), Brian McLaren suggests that we need to learn the practical skills necessary to love well, starting with those closest to us. When those skills are practiced at home they can then be put to use out in the world with others.
His is an extensive list, and to my mind, there isn’t one that isn’t worth the effort. And, because the list is so expansive it might feel a little daunting to you as it does to me, so rather than take it all on at once, pick a few that beckon to you. Or maybe better yet, ask those near and dear to you which ones they would love to see you practice, which btw is practicing skills 7, 17, and 18.
Common Courtesies
Gratitude
Admitting Weaknesses & Failures
Self-Reporting Emotions
Expressing Hurt & Disappointment
Confronting & Forgiving
Asking For Help
Differing Graciously
Surfacing & Negotiating Competing Desires
Taking The First Step To Resolve Conflict
Upholding Wise Boundaries
Saying Yes & No
Winning & Losing Graciously
Creating Win-Win Outcomes
Speaking Truth In Love
Speaking Truth To Power
Asking Good Questions
Requesting Feedback
Expressing Affection
Opening One’s Heart
Giving Gifts
Seeking Wise Counsel
What better gift to give to ourselves, and to those we love this holiday season, than to diligently, humbly, and intentionally practice the skills of love. Love is, after all, the gift that keeps on giving.
Photo by Ylanite Koppens from Pexels